Now, it took me some time to come up with a concrete answer but I have finally figured it out....
HOPE!
Hope is what motivates me to keep going. The sad reality of society today is there is an outbreak of negativity and self doubt. I now realize it’s because there is a huge lack of hope within society.
Real hope and real faith. I too used to always have a negative mindset, a “fuck you” attitude, no real care in the world and no direction or control over my own thoughts. In retrospect I was just floating by.
It took me some time to get to where I am today, and I had to hit the lowest of lows to figure it out.
But hope. Hope in myself, my visions, my dreams. and in God's plan for my life. Hope that I soon would get out from the bottom of my Mental Well and hope that I could feel real happiness again.
Because honestly, suicidal thoughts, lack of hope, hate and negativity just wore me down. There was no good nor real value coming from that kind of mindset.
Hope is what motives me to keep going. Hope is how I got to where I am today and hope is what brings me my success.
First, I needed to figure out why I was so angry and why I would ever resort to suicidal thoughts.
My brother passing away back in 2007 destroyed me. I felt that I lost a part of my soul and honesty I did. Until I was able to recognize, forgive and move forward I was never able to turn his passing away into my WHY. I incorporated that WHY into the love for my family and the care and well-being for others. I knew deep down I wasn’t this angry, negative person.
I knew it was time for change.
It was finally time to learn how to find peace through my pain.
All of this introspection has lead me to where I am today. To be able to reach out to you and say “whatever it is that is causing you pain within, let it go. Whatever trauma that hurt you or frightened you and created this shell, forgive. The more you carry this hate is the further down you go in your Mental Well.
Have hope that you CAN and WILL overcome. KNOW that this negative, suicidal, or doubtful mindset is not the end all be all to your life. You CAN change.
Trust God.
Find you WHY, have HOPE, and BELIEVE.
Then ask yourself. “What motives you to keep going?”.
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